There Ought to Be a Law
Reviewing my credit report is fun. First, only Experian would give me my free report online. The other two wanted me to fill out a PDF and fax it into them. You might think that’s because they’ve got the security of my sensitive personal information in mind.
No, they don’t, actually. Every day, I get pitches from student loan consolidation companies, credit card companies, and even car companies, who got my address from a credit bureau and the DMV. When I look at my credit report and see 50 requests from 24 companies in the last year, I notice many of them are commercial student loan consolidation or credit card companies. My personal information is apparently much hotter than I am. It’s been touched by myriads of hands all over this country and they’re all feverishly looking for ways to get into my pants (at least for my wallet).
I would like to find a way to deny these bastards from buying and selling my information. At least, if they want to pitch me on something useless or send me an envelope with a menacing “OFFICIAL USE ONLY. PRIVATE USE PROHIBITED UNDER PENALTY OF LAW” notice on it, they should be good enough to give me a little fun out of it. They should fly the hottest person at their company to my house to give me a thrill. Until they start to do that, is there anybody who knows how to keep my private information in my feverish perverted hands?
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